Manliness (or how to castrate your guest author on public radio)...

I feel about public radio the way many people describe feeling about a rival sibling. On a semi-regular basis, things are said that boil my blood and roll my eyes. But even so, the time we've spent together would likely result in a punch in the neck to anyone who tries to bash NPR.

Recently, Jayson and I were listening to a download of the the show "On Point," the topic - "Manliness."

No, really, the show was titled that, after a book of the same name. The author (a male who's last name, ironically enough, had the word "Man" in it) explained that even amid our society's gender-neutral ideals, there are traits (healthy & unhealthy) to which men are prone, and men and women being equal does not make us interchangable. Meanwhile, an arrogant, postmodern "liberated" female scholar discredited him (and his gender) relentlessly.

While I have never (with the possible exception of my first 2 months of marriage) identified much with the third-wave feminist ideals, there is much to be said for the battles of my 19th-century sisters and even those in the 1960s, especially in education.

In 1869, John Stuart Mill published The Subjection of Women to demonstrate that "the legal subordination of one sex to the other is wrong...and...one of the chief hindrances to human improvement." And we ladies have come along way. But isn't there a point (especially if our definition of "subordinating" something is to "treat it as of less value or importance") where we're unmarginalizing one group to the demeaning of the other? Of course, Webster was just another dead white male...

I'm not trying to get political or advocate Mr. Manliman; by intent or slow wit, he said some pretty idiotic stuff too. It's just that in all the effort to move past "socially constructed" gender boundaries and convict this guy of chauvanism, no one seemed to notice the woman's condescending off-handed generalizations about men.

I don't know about Manliness - I find it quite elusive to define. All I know is when I let out a long weepy sigh, and Jayson looks gruff and asks "What can I beat up that's making you do that?" I like the feeling it gives me.

"Your hair looks fine..."

I am convinced that one of the most elusive yet valuable useful skills you can have as a person is the ability to tell someone what you really think in a way that does not make them want to stop being your friend. That is one of the reasons I think Jesus was so cool.

This afternoon, I was thinking about all the games we play trying to figure out how to be honest enough with people to be able to live with ourselves without constantly sending death blows to each other's precious egos. I usually end up choosing the passive aggressive route.

You would think this would only be an issue with people we don't know very well and want to think we are polite or cool, like new acquaintances or people who might read our blogs. But I think sometimes it's stinking hard to be honest with close friends. I mean, I don't want to come off as a know-it-all jerk, but sometimes people have ideas about things that don't make much sense or are doing stuff that's obviously harmful, and sometimes they get bad haircuts.

I was reading a verse today that says something about being the kind of person who sees constructive criticism from friends as a "kindness" instead of refusing it. I'm starting to have a great deal of respect for my friends who use the phrase "What do you think?" in a way that you can tell they really want to know...

As soon as the storm windows are gone...

defenestration : dE-"fe-n&-'strA-sh&n
(noun, etymology: de- + Latin fenestra window)
a throwing of a person or thing out of a window

I am as yet unpersuaded as to who/what will be the lucky defenestree, but I am open to suggestion. Regardless, learning new big words would have much more appeal if they all sounded like this much fun...

The downside of royalty...

People who don't exercise get sad and chubby; now that it is not snowing, I must start being more active again.

Today, I went for a walk with David Crowder shoved down the backside of my pants. This approach to making exercise bearable and more spiritual proved only marginally successful, as he and the CD player kept sliding down into uncharted places and slowing me down.

I'm not sure when my transition into princess-dom occurred, but my new-found lust for an iPod brings to my attention that it undoubtably has. My perfectly functional & portable, skip-protected compact disk player may as well have been a turntable strapped to my back, with my large, visible headphones flagging my obsolescence and poverty for the neighborhood's amusement, in case anyone on The Boulevard failed to notice. Surely, this is unacceptable.

While being a princess has it's advantages (like not being expected to eat fast food), I'm not entirely sure how I feel about this royalty thing. If I ever obtain an iPod, what will I be able to feel pious about not owning?