"Your hair looks fine..."

I am convinced that one of the most elusive yet valuable useful skills you can have as a person is the ability to tell someone what you really think in a way that does not make them want to stop being your friend. That is one of the reasons I think Jesus was so cool.

This afternoon, I was thinking about all the games we play trying to figure out how to be honest enough with people to be able to live with ourselves without constantly sending death blows to each other's precious egos. I usually end up choosing the passive aggressive route.

You would think this would only be an issue with people we don't know very well and want to think we are polite or cool, like new acquaintances or people who might read our blogs. But I think sometimes it's stinking hard to be honest with close friends. I mean, I don't want to come off as a know-it-all jerk, but sometimes people have ideas about things that don't make much sense or are doing stuff that's obviously harmful, and sometimes they get bad haircuts.

I was reading a verse today that says something about being the kind of person who sees constructive criticism from friends as a "kindness" instead of refusing it. I'm starting to have a great deal of respect for my friends who use the phrase "What do you think?" in a way that you can tell they really want to know...